Disconnect

One of my favorite topics to see romanticized in movies, books, or simply in my own world view is the intertwined nature of the universe. It's comforting to know... that even though you may feel insignificant you may have completely changed to course of someones life by delaying them an extra minute at the checkout while you dig around in your purse for a credit card. Maybe they would have been in a car crash, maybe they'll be in one now, it could determine whether they run into the love of their life. The point is we're all in it together and you are influenced more by a stranger than you realize. I find that beautiful. It makes me feel comforted when I'm at my loneliest. Every choice we make... whether we smile at the person we pass on the street has some value and is input into the overall equation of the universe. Small changes could have a huge impact.

We're all connected and what we say and do matters. We can change another person's life far more easily than we realize. Yet in this day and age... with so many ways to reach out to others... technology such as the internet making the world so much smaller and allowing so many new connections... why is it people seem to have a much harder time relating to one another?

It's understandable that we wouldn't break down into sobs when hearing of a massacre in which a hundred died on the other side of the world. It would be hard to live a healthy life and feel for every tragedy around the world. At a certain point disconnecting is the only way to get by. That's not that disconnect I'm referring to.

People seem capable of forgetting that they have an influence on other human beings. It seems so much more common to see interactions where people entirely fail to put themselves in someone else's position. It's the person who shoves past others to get to where they're going, not carrying that you dropped everything as a result. The person who takes out all their frustrations on the cashier that's going a little too slow. It's the person that leaves a hurtful, degrading, pointless criticism on someone's online post. It's everywhere.

(Edit: I used a story I had apparently read about but didn't link as an example of this here. Apparently I'd read something about a young man who committed suicide while broadcasting it live online and the police weren't called until after he was cold 12 hours after his initial announcement of his intent. I don't know if this story was true/accurate as I don't have a source to reference. I stated he'd made the threat before and seemed to believe no helpful words were offered throughout... I don't know how accurate this is. I don't know if people thought he was acting but according to my version he was cheered on. I remove the original paragraph it because I have a different take and some real world training on suicide prevention and because I question the accuracy... but leave this because it's clearly what prompted the whole post for me.)

It seems the technology that lets us connect with the rest of the world for at least some does just the opposite. The sense of anonymity lets people think that can do or say anything and the weight of their choices doesn't matter. It's too easy to forget or not care that there are real people out there on the other side of all these screens. The insults are heard by someone real. Your kinda advice does impact the mood and choices of someone out there. Shoving people out of the way to get your point across has an impact on everyone else.

It's exhausting to imagine how even little things we do without thinking have an impact. For this reason it can be tempting to avoid it or ignore it at times. To a certain degree that can be healthy. If we're too afraid to do anything that might offend we won't make many good points. We might not feel comfortable doing anything if taken too far. I think we've become too good at pushing it all out of mind to meet our own needs. It's too easy to disconnect and overlook the very real pain or joy that's present all around us and impacted by our choices. We need to learn to stop and think or we'll lose some very core parts of what makes us human.